lessons learned

Week two and it's probably time for an update. Especially after my last correspondence was a little dark and stormy. I never know what will become of the post when I set out to write it. And it's always dictated by the mood I am in when I sit down at the computer. Here we go again...

What I have learnt over the last week is that I can't expect anything. Especially from myself. I cannot make assumptions. I have to be willing to ride the wave until the very end. That is after all why I am back here in this very situation. It is lessons like these that I would like to take with me long after I have left the dusty confines of Sinon. What is... is. Take it, experience it, deal with it and move on.

I would like to think that I personally am my only constant. This would indicate to me a sense of control in my life. But at the moment it would seem that I have relinquished that role to my beloved... I am so very lucky and grateful to have him here with me. But my mind. It plays tricks on me. As I process it all and move throughout my day I can go from bright and cheery to dark and gloomy in a matter of moments, for no apparent reason at all. I don't trust myself and find it difficult to be in control.

I'm trying to read, write and take time out for myself but this has led me to be a little self absorbed. Maybe all of my daily woes would be less significant if I concentrated on something other than me... *light bulb moment*

Till next week and hopefully something a little more inspired....

H x